After 21 years on this planet, I can confidently and truthfully say
I love myself.
Though the journey to self love wasn’t easy, but it was definitely worthwhile.
Growing up, I always considered myself an outcast- I always wished I was better looking, skinnier, dressed better, not “weird”, etc. This constant feeling of not being good enough was so overwhelming that it shaped how I acted on a daily basis. I never talked much or stated my opinion or expressed myself in general because of the fear of being ignored, judged, etc would overpower my desire for expression. I never called myself “pretty” or “cute” or complimented myself because I felt that people would shut me down for being too confident without having the right to do so.
Though I’m not sure why or how things started to become this way, I’m sure that it stemmed from always comparing myself to others. I felt that since there were prettier, funnier, more “normal” people out there, why should I be cocky? Guys weren’t flooding my DMs or texts or bombarding my social media pictures with comments of admiration. I was too caught up with comparing and determining my worth through what others did better than me, that I didn’t focus on what was great about myself.
When I was about 20/ when I first turned 21, I slowly started to experience a surge in confidence. I had an epiphany that made me realize that I need to value myself, and not through the eyes of others. I remember being told by a person “How would you be able to love others without loving yourself first?”, and that stayed with me forever. I also realized that confidence is one of the most attractive things that a person can posses. How could I expect anyone to value myself or find me attractive when I don’t see these amazing qualities in myself?
I’m at the point in my life where I know exactly who I am. I know my worth and what I have to offer, and at this stage nobody can tell me anything that would push me to think otherwise. If anyone tells me I’m unattractive, I’m weird, not funny, or anything of that sort I’d personally just shrug it off, because I honestly disagree. Even if they do genuinely feel this way, you just has to accept that with over 7 billion people on the planet, it’s impossible for everyone to like you.
Confidence is a characteristic that I personally feel that everyone should attain. As I said, the journey may not be easy, but it’s definitely worth it. And I’m 1,000 times happier at 21 than I was at 17, 18, or 19.
“Love yourself, girl, or nobody will”